Grey…

Living in the inner city, has its ups and downs….

The staying, the connecting, the complexity of it all makes life seem real.

Not above, not naive, not removed from the abuse, neglect, and advantages taken.

Caring, believing, confronting, realizing there is a harshness brought by manipulation in those with broken hearts…

Shattered by poverty, hardened by anger, dominance, inattention, and harmful cycles of subjection.

The disrespect, manipulation, stereotypes ingrained because a percentage is broken, mentally irrational for there is…

A damage so deep, a wound so gaping and exposed revealing words, gestures, accusations–all survival skills–

Poverty survival skills, teenage girl survival skills, girls taking advantage of being girls, & women taking advantage of being women survival skills.

A man trying to command respect, be treated with dignity, walk and connect with his neighbors, always helping, always believing people are intrinsically good, honest, forthright, and earnest. 

But in the end the damage is done and the reality of a mind corrupt from realities unknown, burdens unknown, abuses unknown, lashing out in defense through accusations….

Confrontational at all opportunities, this drives people away, builds walls, and creates fear and resentment. Is it fair, is it fixable, is there a different way?

Honesty is foggy when so many storms have passed, the world is covered in grey but the grey can be bright, it can hold us together and nurture new beginnings because grey is only the balance of black and white–it is the coming together of it all, the commonality.

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Let’s blend, let’s talk, let’s help, let’s heal, and be aware where the hate is, who is the perpetrator, and confront the root of the problem, not the vulnerable bystander. Isn’t that where it all began in the first place?

It was a rough night, and I had to express myself to release my thoughts, disappointment, discouragement, and frustrations. Sorry it is a bit off topic, but I feel it’s important to show our true colors, emotions, and reveal the struggles we are all presented with at times. The humanity of it all. I will continue to try and center myself around balance, Yin & Yang as well as, continue to try and exemplify my beliefs and values.

Thanks for listening,

~Anne

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